Jane Honda
02-02-2007, 07:58 AM
Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.
Customers using this new facility are requested to
use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have been developed.
Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."
MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter
PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and
withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.
**********************************************
FEMALE PROCEDURE:
Unfortunately, most of this part is the
truth.!!!!
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required
amount to align car window with
the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window
down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents
on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will
call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine
due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary.
with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place
cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place
receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place
card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting
behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake
SEND THIS TO A MAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO
THE LADIES YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT!
Customers using this new facility are requested to
use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have been developed.
Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."
MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter
PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and
withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.
**********************************************
FEMALE PROCEDURE:
Unfortunately, most of this part is the
truth.!!!!
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required
amount to align car window with
the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window
down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents
on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will
call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine
due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary.
with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place
cash inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place
receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place
card into the slot provided!
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting
behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake
SEND THIS TO A MAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO
THE LADIES YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT!