Seeking advice. . .

[Signal Transmitted]

I am a noob here. So much so, in fact, that I do not even HAVE a bike (see profile). But I want one. In fact, I want one so badly that it could be considered a "need" rather than a desire.

My problem? Besides having ready cash (I am saving - refuse to do the credit thing), it's my husband. His response to my pleas for a bike is the old standard, "You are not getting a motorcycle. You'll get killed."

Is there anyone here who can offer up a good counter-argument to that particular objection? (I have considered selling him to the highest bidder, which might net me some starter cash, but I need him around to help with non-bike-related things, like the mortgage. He is also handy when there's a jar I can't open).

Obviously I have an awful lot of research and education to take care of before I start looking at sportbikes, but all that is moot unless I get the male unit to agree.

(Yes, I could do it anyway, but it would cause needless friction).

[kartik]

Let me welcome you first of all! It would help us to help you if you could tell something about your riding experience. You don't have a bike...does that mean you have never rode a bike? It would also help if we could get some insight about your significant other. Does he ride or is he the type of guy who thinks twice before going for a walk because he could get hit by a kid on a tricycle?

If you are serious I think you should go do an MSF course and prove to your husband that you are going to do it the safe way. If he is a reasonable person that should work but if he is not you should consider letting sleep on the couch for a few days:yes:

[Jane Honda]

Kartik,

I'm sure he will be enjoying the sleeping comforts of the hide a bed... Thats from what I know of him.


ST, Just remember what I told you before. Make sure you use the cost effective route (this may not affect him either). Also, get your gear first. If I had gear to send you, I would. I have a helmet. :rad: It's practically brand new, worn only a few times. I agree on the MSF course as well.

Start a subscription to a magazine too.

After all you have done for him, I think he should not put up too much of a fight for you to pursue something you desire. :wub:

I will post up more, once I think of anything else.

[Flyte Risk]

Sometimes it's easier to ask for forgiveness then it is permission.

For us to really help your side we need to know if his statement that "you'll get killed" is because you'd be on a bike in general or that you're a woman on a bike.

[Signal Transmitted]

Thanks for the welcome, Kartik. And my last riding experience was a good 15 years ago. A roommate (and buddy) had a Ninja, and taught me to ride, eventually letting me take the bike alone for short rides and trips to the store and such. I realize now that this is far from the ideal approach to learning, but I was one of those 25 -year-olds with the misconception that I was immortal. I was undoubtedly a hazard and probably got unknowingly lucky more than once. I also spent several hours as the "girl-in-back". The bug bit good and hard, but it's been latent until the past 3 years or so.

So I consider myself a complete and total novice; not sure if I could even remember how to shift!

Ironically, my husband is a competitive cyclist, as if THAT doesn't have its share of risk. But his argument, not without validity, is that he does not commute in traffic or train on busy roads. Still, crashes happen, though he has not had a serious one to date. Part of the problem is that his nephew has a motorcycle and is pretty casual about safety - he has been lucky so far, but his stories about reckless crap he's pulled on the bike do nothing to advance my cause with Jarvie (the husband).

And Flyte, the "you'll get killed" is a statement in general, not gender-related.

I like both suggestions so far; any recommendations on which magazine would be good?

[Ms. Flyte Risque]

You can get killed crossing the street for craps sake.Ahhh, so he's comparing your potential fabulous iding skill to someone who is lazy or unsafe. Maybe this is where there is misconception. I know I have no room to talk, I have not bike, thus no experience, but i do LOVE FAST cars, and I know bikes offer more "need for speed" than cars ....and I am envious of you all! (I have nitrous on my 3rd gen Camaro waiting in the wings for it's upgrade engine and tranny T56 6-speed swap.) :rad:

You can only gain skills by going out on rides, eventually going out on longer and longer, more skill challenging rides once you aquire your bike and you practice, practice, practice. You can't get experience if you do get on it and venture out. When Flyte goes out on many group rides, you'd think they were setting sail for some uncharted course. Much thought goes into planning the routes but also the skills and the pace of the riders joining the ride are also considered.

Figure out how to connect with the bike, whichever one that may be. I have sat and listened many times to how Flyte talks about how he handles his bike, skillfully I might add too, he's a knee dragger:yes: , though never witnessing it with my own eyes, but others talking about it who have riden with him. He's come a very long way, he has his own style of riding. You will too, once you get past your hubbies aversions for you owning a bike. It's all time! Hang in there! :thumbup:

[BadRepp66]

Signal Transmitted, when I was married, my wife (a very small woman, cheer-leader and dance team type profile) rode not only a dirt bike but a Suzuki Katana 600 as well. If you are serious about it, do like Jane suggested, get some magazines and do the MSF course, buy some protective gear and also a few cycle traders around to keep the suggestion out in the open to the husband. Also, like Jane Says (hey, that's a Janes Addiction song!!!), I digress, sorry, but yeah, if you take away the "access" to the wife, he might be a bit more receptive to letting you get a bike. Good luck.

You are in Atlanta? I used to be stationed at FT Benning and in the last 45 days, I have been to FT Stewart twice. Arghh...

[Flyte Risk]

After much thought I have decided the following,

IMO, the simplest way to get what you want and let him warm up to it would be to set dates that you will be doing things. Like on Jan 15th you will be buying your gear, then on March 1st you will be taking your safety course, all the while you will be deciding on which bike you want and you will be buying your bike on April 21st. (dates changable to waht suits your schedule)

When the gear comes home he'll see you're serious, when you take the safety course that will reinforce your determination to him and maybe by the date you set to purchase he'll have enough time to settle his issues within himself.

You may also want to sign him up for the MSF course with you. That way he knows you have learned basicc skills and he might even get the bug from being on one too.

[Signal Transmitted]

After much thought I have decided the following,

IMO, the simplest way to get what you want and let him warm up to it would be to set dates that you will be doing things. Like on Jan 15th you will be buying your gear, then on March 1st you will be taking your safety course, all the while you will be deciding on which bike you want and you will be buying your bike on April 21st. (dates changable to waht suits your schedule)

When the gear comes home he'll see you're serious, when you take the safety course that will reinforce your determination to him and maybe by the date you set to purchase he'll have enough time to settle his issues within himself.

You may also want to sign him up for the MSF course with you. That way he knows you have learned basicc skills and he might even get the bug from being on one too.

Now that. . .is an excellent idea. I've been reading up on gear and plan to make a trek to some of the area bike shops this coming weekend. I've been assured that the motorcycle community in general are always happy to take the time to help out a novice.
I need to break him in gently. As I said, I'm somewhat strong-willed about certain things, and it won't be the end of the world, or even my marriage, if I don't get his full endorsement. But at least he'll know I'm being responsible about it. It would be awesome if he got into it as well, but my goal right now is to get him to be able to say the words "wife" and "motorcycle" in the same sentence without flinching as if someone's slapped him across the face with a pair of pee-soaked underwear.
Thanks for the assistance so far. I warn you that MANY more questions will follow. . .unless you get so damn tired of me that you ban me just to shut my ass up. ("God, what else is that Signal chick going to ask TODAY?")

[Redlegracing]

My :2cents: worth first off I'll address the getting killed thing....
It does not matter what you do when it's your time its your time case in point Dale Ernheart died at datona T-3 hitting it at 180mph.... three weeks later Aaron slight hit the same corner doing 191 mph on a motorcycle and only suffured a broken pinkie... its not the fall but the sudden stop that kill you.... secondly let me address the husband wife thing I have always felt that a couple should support each other on their endevours:hug: and interests. and if one or the other does not like the idea that they should not kill the idea but instead support the fact that they still have different interests... Respect.... :coffee: Money wise bikes are just plane cheaper to operate.....

Kevin

[Jane Honda]

Thanks for the assistance so far. I warn you that MANY more questions will follow. . .unless you get so damn tired of me that you ban me just to shut my ass up. ("God, what else is that Signal chick going to ask TODAY?")


Yeah. Not gonna happen. :haha:

[Nicegy525]

I agree with Flyte's statements (shocking I know) :yes:

I especially agree with convincing him to take the MSF with you. He might get bitten by the bug. If nothing else he'll see youre serious about playing it safe and learning properly.

[Flyte Risk]

Like I said, set your dates and stick to them. Not before, not after but on the day you said do what you planned.

It'll make it easier in the future when you tell him you signed up for a trackday.

[Signal Transmitted]

I've been perusing bikes for sale online at one of the better known, long-time bike shops here in Atlanta (they've been around since I was a wee one) and I'm planning a visit this weekend. Depending on the hubby's mood I may take him along - who knows? If he's grumpy and bitchy, off I sneak. Brochures will be left lying around in strategic places.
And I investigated the MSF courses around here - they actually offer them through the DMV. None til January, but I can wait, as doing so will be more cost effective right now.
Ideally - I get gear for Christmas. This just makes sense. So I am trying to figure out how to win him over there. (Funny - I already HAVE a jacket; a nice heavy HD one. I got it last Christmas, and it was supposed to be the compromise gift. No bike, but I got the cool looking jacket! Don't really wanna Harley, but I digress). Failing that, Chrismas money buys some basic gear.
SO. . .right now the schedule is Jan 9, 10, 11 - MSF course. I will at least need boots and preferably a helmet (they will provide, but yuk) for the course. I would also like to find time for a basic maintenance course, as this is something I plan to do on my own. I like that sort of responsibility - it's kind of therapeutic.
I also have a birthday in Feb. . .things start warming up around here then, so . . .I need to plan a date!

[Signal Transmitted]

Update: he's starting to bend a little! From "Absolutely no way" to "we'll talk about it" and "the only way you're getting a bike is if I get one and ride with you"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Jane Honda]

Update: he's starting to bend a little! From "Absolutely no way" to "we'll talk about it" and "the only way you're getting a bike is if I get one and ride with you"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Thats freaking awesome!!!! :rad:


Yay! I'm excited for you now! :thumbup::fly::ride::clapping: